An Early Loss

6 04 2010

It’s somewhat fitting in a sad way that the last post I wrote about, Dude It’s a Dolphin, was a story told to me by my husband’s ex-best friend.  He passed away on March 1, 2010 one week shy of his 42nd birthday due to complications from pancreatitis.  He left behind his 36-year-old wife and 12-year-old son.  At one time, he was my husband’s best friend and his wife was my best friend.  In fact, it was because of our best friends dating that my husband and I were set up in the first place.  Over the year, we drifted apart as friends sometimes do.  We reconciled with them many years ago and then went our separate ways for good.  In hindsight, stupid arguments gave way to hurt feelings and a break in the friendship that would never be healed.  In fact, my husband hadn’t spoken to his best friend in over 10 years at the time of his friend’s death.  We had some mutual friends, which was how we found out about my husband’s friend’s death.

My husband was completely shocked by how deeply this had affected him.  They hadn’t spoken for almost 4 years, which was the last time my husband attempted a reconciliation with his former best friend in person.  Anyone that knows my husband, however, was not surprised at the depth of his pain.  At one point in their lives, these two had been closer than brothers.  His biggest regret?  He could never “fix it”, meaning their broken friendship.  There was now a finality to everything.  He would never again have the opportunity to extend a hand and have the hope of reliving the great brotherhood they shared so many years ago.

The oddest/best thing to come out of this was that my ex-best friend and I have seemed to mend our broken friendship in the wake of this tragedy in her life.  Out of the mulch buds a rose.  I didn’t want to have this chance to “fix it” pass me by like it had my husband.  It’s just one of life’s lessons, I guess.

B.W.

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